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07 April 2012 @ 02:17 pm
7 words Meme  
These words were given to me by [personal profile] naeko. If you want me to give you 7 words, just comment here and I'll come up with something. :)

Arthurian Legend
My crack, let me show you it. I grew up with King Arthur- it was one of the first books I read and I loved the idea of knighthood and chivalry and Arthur's ideals, and Morgan le Fay... omg. Everything. I even thought it was awesome that there was all this madness business- "madness of Sir Lancelot" etc. Then the hilariously awful cartoon called Young King Arthur and the Knights of Justice came on and Princess Gwenivere and the Jewel Riders. ZOMG.

Granted as a grown up I get there's more to it that hermits in the woods curing you when you run mad and decide to live as a tree for months on end, whilst everyone wears pretty clothes and watches jousting tournaments. I love the character of Morgana/Morgan le Fay especially and her evolution through the years- originally she was more like a healer for Arthur's knights and then she sort of became the part-time antagonist except when she decides at random to be helpful, which has to be even more confusing to live with. "Morgan are you pro-us today or are you going to poison everyone?" "I don't know, let's flip a coin."

Buffy the Vampire Slayer
This was the crack of my middle school years. I wanted to be Buffy so bad I became a cheerleader. I wanted to talk like them and dress like them and oh the angst of wanting a vampire boyfriend, etc. BUFFY I LOVE YOU FOREVER. Then we got Angel which was kind of good sometimes but Buffy was the original and Buffy was the best. I just love how she was a blond who was kind of a ditz (like moi!) and still managed to kick ass. It made me so happy as a tween because maybe I could kick ass too!

I do this a lot. Obviously. But as an only child who had pneumonia a squillion times and was always getting sick it was like read or die of boredom, but I liked reading. I still like reading because you can go live someone else's life for a few hours and unlike television you can build the world in your head. My mom always got annoyed with me because if I got overwhelmed or bored I would just stick my nose in book and not come out.

OH GOD ELVES. It was that step between ponies and vampires, and then I read lord of the rings and Galadriel help me, I was a Legolas fangirl... then Lord of the Rings came out when I was in High School and I proceeded to crush on Orlando Bloom as only a teenage girl can. There were posters. POSTERS. I wanted pointy ears and to live in Mirkwood.

Honestly, I blame David Bowie. Had I not seen his tights and all that glitter in Labyrinth as a child maybe I wouldn't have gone gaga for elves so badly. OMG the Labyrinth fanfic I wrote... I was 12. You can imagine. I wanted to go live with the fairies/goblins/whatever and dance around in crystal ballrooms in GIGANTIC FUCKOFF BALLGOWNS. While obviously vacationing to Mirkwood to make out with Legolas. Oh and then there was the five-second attempt to learn Elvish but I gave up on that in favor of Spanish because I realized I could possible flirt with real boys in Spanish. Except then I realized real boys were kind of sucky at 13 and went back to being in love with Legolas.

[profile] obislollipop then reminded me of hot Jedis and I wandered off to go crush on Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon and Mace Windu. Jedi are kind of elves what with magic powers and all only minus the ears and eternal life, you know? So that was how my elf-phase mostly ended, although I admit I sometimes still crush on fictional elvish characters... like Trent Kalamack in the Rachel Morgan books. He's an ass and yet I sort of adore him.

OH AND OMFG MERRY GENTRY. MERRY GODDAMN GENTRY. Okay that's fairies more than elves but I am positive [personal profile] naeko and [personal profile] dwg can attest about the sheer wtf'ery of that series. I really loved the idea of the series because Sidhe Princess! Unseelie Court! Politics! Banishment! Etc! *flails* And then it was just stupid sex and pr0nz and LSD imagery... I gave up. So now the Rachel Morgan books are the only elves in my life.

OM NOM NOM. Husband went to Italy and brought home yummy wines. I am not a wine taster though so I can just tell you if I liked it or didn't like it, and I kind of find the 'wine connossieur' thing to be ridiculous especially when they like try to compose poetry to the wine in their mouth and it's like "Really? You just sound like a pretentious ass now." Because I don't care how awesome it is, if you start telling me "Woodsy notes of earthiness fading into a n explosion of summer berries and the notes of autumnal sunsets that swirl across the senses before shimmering to the incandescent berry finish" Oookay, I want whatever pill you took before you downed that drink. I have yet to feel a taste sparkle and I'm not sure I want to.

People just get so snobby about wines and let's be real half of them don't know wtf they're talking about they just read the dealer's description and are spouting it off with some added verbage.

Ouija Boards
LULZ. Oh my tweenage self had such a fixation. My mom's got a New Age streak in her and there are lots of candles and crystals and tarot decks and fortune telling gizmos stuck in the corners of our house- including Ouija boards. She says they make a good meditation tool. Idk. They're fun and ridiculous and I adore them. I also love them for the effect they have on specific stupid people who freak out about DEMONZ OH NOEZ.

Protip: If you think Ouija boards are demonic, get thee to thy goode psycho-analyst and check on yon prescriptions.

I sort of love/hate it. I like driving along and cruising and being mistress of my own destiny or whatever and all that jazz, but otoh heavy traffic freaks me out. Why? Because people are stupid, and I'm kind of a ditz and I just know if I don't fuck up then one of them will and we'll all die in a fiery explosion while Bruce Willis leaps over twisted metal to tackle a terrorist.

Okay maybe that last part is exaggerated but it's totes still valid. I really fucking miss having a car though, because being stuck at home during the day blows. I know how Victorian chicks went all crazyland now. Blah.

Also: DEER. Fucking deer. Everywhere. There is nothing worse than having to drive during mating or hunting seasons in/around Hometown. OMFG. They just appear on the road like some kind of demented Frogger and then there's swerving and breaks squealing and screaming. And did you know you can die of Head On Deer Encounters? Oh yes, yes you can. It happens like once a year in hometown. Someone hits a deer and it comes through the windshield and you're just dead. Seatbelts not helpful. It is one point in favor of driving a ginormous fucking farm truck that you can hit a deer and be like "Oh was there a speed bump?" Driving a tiny ickle car otoh it's like "OH GOD WE WILL ALL DIE NOW AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

And that's of course neglecting the whole part about how there are no drivers' ed courses anymore so teenagers happen, and the people who are just sucky drivers, or just mistakes made because it is humans doing the driving. Eeeek. It's just sort of hard to deal.
why don't you go sit on a spear?: (cute overload) wheee-racoonsavepureness on April 7th, 2012 08:22 pm (UTC)
I would like 7 words, please ^^.
Professor Fancypants von Deth, Esq: Hellboy - Deathdwg on April 8th, 2012 12:02 am (UTC)
NGL, my mother was against me having a tarot deck because she thought it invited evil. Ditto on how I wasn't allowed to have a ouija board in case it actually conjured something. I find this hilarious given that we used to live in a (probably) haunted house. If we still lived there, I'd be down with the NO SEANCES EVER NOOOOOO thing, but we moved to the most normal house ever.

My friend in high school then gave me a tarot deck for christmas. I have no idea how to use it, but it sure is pretty.